Self-Reflection Part 2 - Recklessness

When I was younger, my mom referred to me as her "edge-walker." I was an edge-walker. Actually, I was fairly self-destructive, but it manifested in a way that screamed I don't five a f***, nothing can hurt me, and if it does...whatev. I think that I've either been really lucky, or have had a spirit guide following me along the way keeping me out of TOO much trouble. There are occasions when I look back and am saddened by how mean I was to myself. But, in some ways, I don't mind all of the hardships that I have gone through, because I have learned a lot of lessons along the way, lessons that I feel I can share with others, especially those who may not yet realize the extent of their own recklessness.

That's right, I'm talking to you.

Let's climb out of the well of denial, shall we? Maybe you drink too much. Perhaps you are a little reckless in *ahem* choosing partners...Maybe you smoke, maybe you do drugs....maybe you SHOP too much. whatever your vices are, are you ready to give up all of those behaviors that no longer serve you?

In order to really tackle these vices you have to get to the root of the problem. Why do I do what to myself? This, my friends, takes some serious self-examination, and it's not easy. A friend an I were just talking last night about how most people don't change, because they are unwilling to look at themselves objectively. When one examines his/herself objectively, they are bound to realize some things that they may not want to admit to. It's sometimes a painful process, but a process necessary for personal growth. And I should add that it is an ongoing process...you will not wake up one day and exclaim "I did it! I'm perfect now!" And that's okay. I personally think it's important that we all just do our best on a day to day basis.

A good tool that someone suggested to me once is to ask yourself, am I treating myself the way that I would treat someone else in my life, like a friend or family member? The answer is mostly likely no. So start there....be KIND to yourself, FORGIVE yourself, give you self room to make mistakes. And LOVE yourself unconditionally, even when you do make mistakes.

I also want to point out that there is a difference between having fun and going overboard. Alcohol is a simple example...sometimes you may want to go out and have a few with friends. That's cool, right? I think so....afterall you are not an *ahem* alcoholic. or so you say. But, ask yourself these questions: 1) am I doing this because I want to, or because I feel I need to? 2) Do I know when to stop? 3) I'm I doing anything that is endangering myself or others? If any of these questions cause you to pause and think about your behavior, then take that pause. Take that time to think. Are you perhaps doing something that is actually harming you?

For the record, these are things that I even think about from time to time. I'm constantly going through self-evaluation, because it is important to me...and at this point in my life the thing that are most important to me are health and happiness. And, although it is sometimes a difficult process, I continue to do my best, and to pick myself back up when I fall so that I may do a little better the next time.

To health and happiness!